Empowering the Heroic Soul Within
by Renée Taintor
PUT IT IN NEUTRAL
The definition of neutral uses words like nonpartisanship, objectiveness, fair-mindedness, and of course the state of being neutral. Your first thought of putting it in neutral may be putting your car into the neutral gear. When you do this, the car can neither go forward nor backward. It remains in a constant state of idle, a state of non-movement. It is still ready to be called into action when you shift into drive or reverse. You could say that it is resting in place. It rests until a decision is made to go forward or backward. The car doesn’t go until YOU make the decision.
Did you know that being in neutral works in your life too? Neutrality is a good place to be in many instances. For example, you are with friends and an argument breaks out. Because you are present in the situation, you can observe how you are responding to it. You might already have decided that one of the people, in your opinion or perception, is overreacting or being irrational. What do you do? How do you respond? Do you say something?
This is a good time to go into neutrality. It means becoming the observer of the situation, like standing back to watch. It means YOU making the decision of being in a mental place of not taking sides. Being aware of your inner responses will indicate how you feel and how you are receiving this information. Is this situation triggering you? Are you angry? Do you feel like you need to be the referee? If you are being triggered by this, then it is not just information for you. It is about you too and it becomes an even better reason to go into neutrality until you can look into your issues about it ~ away from the situation.
Staying in neutrality means not engaging in the internal commentary and not making a decision about it yet. When you do this, you can disengage from any emotions or opinions you may want to communicate. You go into “idle” because the truth is, this is not your “scene.”
It is good to remember that in neutrality, you are the observer, the witness. As soon as you react, you become part of the scene and you are no longer the observer. Remain detached. You didn’t start this and you are not part of it. It is better for all concerned to allow the people involved to find their own way in the situation.
It is also good to know that neutrality carries it’s own vibration. There is no yea or nay about it. You are just the witness, the observer. Holding the space of neutrality actually HELPS the situation because you are not broadcasting your positive or negative vibes about it. You can be in the space of compassion for both sides and allow the energy of the argument to have it’s own life without you adding or subtracting from it. It is not your scene. It belongs to the ones who initiated it.
Holding the space of neutrality also helps you maintain the presence of calm support. If words are necessary or requested, you can mirror what people are feeling or saying to show support. For example you can say, I understand your frustration and confusion. It must be difficult for you. I support you.
This is the space of natural neutrality. It is a safe place of self-management and it offers a better view of what is going on around you. It is the place where you have freer access to your own wisdom because you aren’t captured by the emotions of the moment or tempted to enter into the fray.
Neutrality is a presence that you can move into when conversations as well as family and work situations arise and become uncomfortable or controversial. If you don’t want to get involved with arguments and shouting matches, you can find that place inside you where peace, understanding, compassion, and acceptance live . . . and you can be present there.
Some people have discovered that neutrality is somewhat of a super power. With so much going on within you and around you, you may want to further explore the benefits of finding your own inner neutrality that timelessly and patiently exists inside you.